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Showing posts from June, 2009

Funny Sayings Page 16

The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
William Clayton

The fact that no one understands you doesn't make you an artist.
Unknown

I love gentiles. In fact, on of my favorite activities is Protestant spotting.
Mel Brooks

I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain. And most do.

John Goodman isn't fat. He's in a category beyond fat. What does one call it? Whalelike
Sam Kinison

Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much. You’re not that good.

I’m always looking for meaningful one night stands.
Dudley Moore

How do you know you're really ugly? Dogs close their eyes when they're humping your leg.

Marriage is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.

Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.
Mark Twain

You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me.

One reason I don’t drink is that I want to know when I am hav…

Funny Short Sayings

Sit comfortably, have a cup of coffee in your hand and be ready for journey, the journey of funny short sayings. Unlike other journey which consists of some degree of tiredness, this journey will provide you with giggles, chuckles, laughter, fun and humor. When you came back from this journey, you’ll feel refreshed, lightened and ecstatic.

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

You’re just 18 with (?) year’s experience.

Funny how the new things are the old things.
Rudyard Kipling

The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.
Sarah Brown

My Nuts are Ok.

A difference of tastes in jokes is a great strain on the affections.
George Eliot

I don't recognize you - I've changed a lot.
Oscar Wilde

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
Mel Brooks

I have enjoyed life a lot more by saying yes than by saying no.  Source

Early to rise, and early to bed, makes a…