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Funny Sayings Page 6

  • Laugh often, Dream big, Reach for the stars!
  • A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking. The remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he really is very good, in spite of all the people who say he is very good.
  • Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
  • Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.
  • If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.
  • If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
  • A comedian does funny things. A good comedian does things funny.- Buster Keaton
  • Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.- Unknown
  • Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes? ----Groucho Marx
  • I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades...or a game of fake heart attack.
  • I'm attempting to construct a mnemonic memory circuit, using stone knives and bearskins. – Spock
  • A poor surgeon hurts 1 person at a time. A poor teacher hurts 130.
    Ernest Leroy Boyer
  • The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
    Vince Lombardi
  • I see your face when I am dreaming. That's why I always wake up screaming.
  • Here officer, hold my beer while I find my license.
  • Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should
    be happier than others.
    Oscar Wilde
  • A drink a day keeps the shrink away.
  • Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
    Oscar Wilde
  • Things are more like they are now than they have ever been.
    Gerald Ford
  • If men knew all that women think, they would be twenty times more daring.
    Alphonse Karr
  • I never loved another person the way I loved myself.
    Mae Wes
  • One advantage of marriage it seems to me is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you it keeps you together until maybe you fall in again.
    Judith Viorst
  • Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.
    Erma Bombeck
  • The worst feature of a new baby is its mother’s singing. —- Kin Hubbard


  1. "Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population." ... This one was really funny...

  2. I have noticed that whenever I noticed you never notice that I have noticed

  3. Latest survey has also shown that 1 out of 2 people makeup 50% of world's population. :-P

  4. The saying -Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together - That one is said by Adam Savage, On the mythbusters

  5. I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger, and then it hit me!

  6. it is a fact of life that you will always pick the trolley with wobbly wheel.

  7. this page is really funny and cool.....enjoyed reading quotes.

  8. Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning? and
    He has a face like a Saint -a Saint Bernard that is–

  9. Very Nicee :P keep posting

  10. soooooooo i read everything haha pretty funny (: i love these


  12. math illiteracy effects 8 out of every 5 people....

  13. This page is just hilarious. Makes my nait. Keep up Admin.

  14. I hate when I am standing at the bus stop and someone asks me, "did the bus come already?" No I have been here since 7am and it now 3pm.


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Doing nothing is very hard to do, you never know when you’re finished.

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Funny Sayings Page 18

After 30, a body has a mind of its own.

Don't think of yourself as an ugly person. Think of yourself as a beautiful monkey!

He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.
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