I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. ~Elayne Boosler
Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you. ~Colin Sautar
To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the project manager, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office. - Robert Frost
The most important thing is not to stop questioning. - Albert Einstein
Do not worry if others do not understand you. Instead worry if you do not understand others. -----Confucius
You are a time millionaire - for a rich life invest wisely. (Richard Andrews
You may have DIALOG or MOBITEL connection, but when you sneeze, all you say is "HUTCH"
You can find tea in a tea cup.. but cannot find world in a world cup.
Drive carefully! Remember, it's not only a car that can be recalled by it's maker. - Anonymous
That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
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Girls are like pianos. When they're not upright, they're grand.
Benny Hill A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick.
Ogden NashOnly two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.
B. JohnsonWe always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
Henny Youngman
Funny Sayings Page 3
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14 comments:
my imagenary friend thinks you have serious mental problems
Where theres a winner, theres a looser.
It's better to give than to sell.
There are three types of people in the world......those who can count and those who can't.
Like many woman my age, I am 28 years old.
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday.
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics ahow that the people who have the most live the longest.
CATfucious say dog run in front of car get tired doggy run in back of car get exhausted either way doggy stupid
No Strings attached .No holds barred. Come get some.
Dhananjay Pendse
if i was a bird i know who i'd shit on first.
Never take life to seriously... your not getting out of it alive
5 facts
1. There are more boys than girls in the world
2. People will always be human... won't they?
3. It is impossible to lick your index finger while looking up
4. You just tried number 3
5. You are laughing at number 4
There are two types of people in this world. Those who pick their nose in public, and those who pick their nose in public and lie about it.
There are 2 cows in a pasture.
One says to the other, "You know, although pi is abbreviated to the first 2 decimals, it actually goes on to infinity. It is also used in most circle equations, and it a very prominent discovery in math."
The second cow turns to the first and says, "Moo."
xD
My neighbour knocked on my door at 2.30 in the morning... can u believe that 2.30am! Lucky for him i was still up playing my Bagpipes
yesterday never happened
tomorrow will never come,
and today will never end
there are 10 types of people in the world, those that can count in binary, and those that cant.
im a very unhappy person, this comment makes me wanna fart in your mouth..... Love, Bertha Gargantua yeahh buster approve the comment or DIE Love, Bertha Gargantua (your ex-wife) i kinda miss you :8) RAWRR you make me wanna suck my toenail, cut it off then give it to you in a cocktail too bad i can't frink yet ohhhh well.. woops ment drink Love ya Deito in a speedo ! yourr handi-crapped..
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