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Funny Sayings Page 10

  • don't look at me in that tone of voice.
  • He's so optimistic he'd buy a burial suit with two pairs of pants. ---Chuck Tanner
  • Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles. --- Unknown
  • I Like this quote I dislike this quote“I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” ---- Oscar Wilde
  • I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted - George Best
  • Of all days, the day on which one has not laughed is the one most surely wasted. ----S├ębastien Roch Nicolas Chamfort
  • A smile starts on the lips, A grin spreads to the eyes, A chuckle comes from the belly; But a good laugh bursts forth from the soul, Overflows, and bubbles all around. -----Carolyn Birmingham
  • I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.
  • Nobody ever died of laughter. ---- Max Beerbohm
  • Laughter is a medicine with no side effects.
  • Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.
  • No, we've had no evidence that Saddam Hussein was involved with September the 11th," Bush NYTimes
  • Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself -- like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks. ----Jean Kerr
  • My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met! Rodney Dangerfield
  • It is a mathematical fact that fifty percent of all doctors graduate in the bottom half of their class.
  • To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
  • Adolescence is the stage between infancy and adultery. Unknown
  • You've got to have something to eat and a little love in your life before you can hold still for any damn body's sermon on how to behave. ----Billie Holiday
  • Oh crap! You're going to try and cheer me up, aren't you?
  • I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes. ---Unknown
  • Should I marry W.? Not if she won't tell me the other letters in her name. ~ Woody Allen
  • If you think your wife's jewellery is an investment, try selling a few pieces.
  • Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.
  • I respect your reality and detonate my own.
  • I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. ---Carol Leifer
  • Life’s a bitch and then you die.
  • There comes a time in every friendship when you have to say: I never liked you in the first place.
  • I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type. ----Bob Hope

Comments

  1. Lol, the thing about not dying from laughter isn't true. They actually had a whole show devoted to people dying, and one way was from laughing for days until his heart failed----- He died from laughter.

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  2. he died from hear failure silly

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  3. but the heart failure was caused from laughing so therefor he did die form laughter.

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  4. Heart failure is not caused from laughing..it would be a pre existing condition.

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  5. you must work in the health insurance field

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  6. Hahaha! now THAT! is funny... lol

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  7. that was the joke...

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  8. I prettiest smile is one made through tears...

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  9. my doctor says am a laugherholic hmm guess am addicted 2 laughing

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  10. no one ever died of laughter but i know someone whose one ear-drums burst due to laughing. He had a surgery and can't hear correctly from that ear.

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  11. I would rather kill myself than commit suicide.

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  12. u know how ur heart beats faster when u exercise... well when the guy laughed it sped up his heart until it finally gave out so yea he did die of laughing XP

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  13. if there was such a thing as litrealization you would have died in childhood!

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  14. I've got one:D Yall are fucking stupid except for the guy up top who said it was a pre-existing condition. He didnt DIE from laughter. That's like say the fat man who DIE from a heart attack died from big mac overdosed LoL.. That show youre talking about... Since when was it a smart idea to believe everything you see on tv? Stfu if you don't know what you're talking about... idiots.

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  15. What a prick.....

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  16. wow what a dick his heart stoped beating because of lack of oxegen from laughing u idiot

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  17. ....Laughter is a medicine with no side effects....

    Really?? cuz sometimes i laugh so hard i start to cry or my sides hurt. or i get bruises 'cause i fall to the dround laughinf...those sound like side effects to me

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  18. laughing now sounds dangerous
    most of the people that type 'lol' are not laughing when they type it
    lol :)

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  19. get this. parachute for sale..never opened,used only once, small stain. har har =~]....i laughed and got a side stich but dont think that was from laughter. just lack of oxygen.

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  20. um people dont u think ur kinda overanalyzing it now?

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  21. You are talking about 1000 ways to die the show...i saw that episode!! If he died from laughing or not no big deal he is dead so RIP

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  22. It is possible to die from laughter over laughing causes lack of breath causing brain failure and deat so technically laughing too much can cause death

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  23. I laughed so hard once that tears ran down my leg.

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  24. Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most.

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