Funny Sayings About Old Age

  • I guess I don’t mind so much being old, as I mind being fat and old. - Peter Gabriel

  • Don’t worry about avoiding temptation – as you grow older, it starts avoiding you.
    ~Author Unknown
  • I’m 59 and people call me middle aged. How many 118 year old men do you know? -Barry Cryer

  • Growing old is like...
    Being increasingly penalized ,
    For a crime you have not committed!
    Anthony Powell
  • I’m not interested in age. People who tell me their age are silly. You’re as old as you feel. ~Elizabeth Arden

  • We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing. ~George Bernard Shaw

  • Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote

  • I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. --- George Burns

  • Old age is when you keeps turning off lights for economical rather than romantic reasons.
    - Lillian Carter
  • I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up. ---Harry Hershfield

  • When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my fifties I was considered eccentric. Here I am doing and saying the same things I did then and I'm labeled senile. --- George Burns

  • Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young.

  • We've put more effort into helping folks reach old age than into helping them enjoy it.

  • Old age takes away what we’ve inherited and gives us what we’ve earned.
    Gerald Brenan

  • Old people like to give good advice, as solace for no longer being able to provide bad examples." La Rochefoucauld

  • You're not 70, you're 20 with 50 years experience.
  • The age of a woman doesn’t mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles.
    Ralph Waldo Emerson.

  • Old age comes at a bad time. ---San Banducci

  • The great thing about getting older is that you don't lose all the other ages you've been. ---Madeleine L'Engle

  • Getting older means, becoming the person you are meant to be."
    Julie Hebert
  • o me old age is 15 years older than I am.

  • "I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch." Woody Allen

  • "You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there." George Burns.

  • I smoke 10 to 15 cigars a day, at my age I have to hold on to something. ~ George Burns
  • "I don't plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet." Rita Rudner.

  • You know you're getting old when you can pinch an inch on your forehead. ~ John Mendoza

  • When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick. ~ George Burns

  • I wouldn't say that you're old...'ve just been young longer than most of us.
  • About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.

  • The harvest of old age is the recollection and abundance of blessing previously secured. ---Marcus Tullius Cicero

  • Inside every older person is a younger person - wondering what the hell happened. ~ Cora Harvey Armstrong


  1. you're as old as the person you're feeling up....

  2. i want to die in my sleep like my grandfather-not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

  3. rebel1717@devianartFebruary 5, 2010 at 11:50 PM

    better to be over the hill then under it...

  4. The Senility Prayer:
    God, grant me the senility to forget the people I never really liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

  5. When I awake in the morning and discover I'm still above ground, I get out of bed and start my day.